As such, I developed simple techniques to help me curb my natural instinct to immediately inject my thoughts into any conversation. Having spent a lifetime being both opinionated and vocal, I’m sure that negatively impacted my likability in the workplace. For example, when I worked in corporate settings, I always admired colleagues who listened more than they spoke. The next question becomes….Can you enhance your likability and if so, how? Absent any specific formula, the best approach might be to identify people in your environment whom you consider to be “very likable” and note their traits and behaviors. And that likability virtually always helps boost their reputation among their peers. The truth is that some people have a natural likability that’s wired into them and spills over into their day to day interactions, their demeanor in meetings, and their work habits. Years ago when I auditioned to train for a major international training company, one of the evaluating trainers told me something that always stuck with me, “You clearly know your stuff, but your best quality might be your likability in the classroom.” As a very Type A project management trainer, I assumed the comment was more of a euphemistic reaction to a subpar performance but later, I realized what a huge compliment that really was. Indeed, likability is one of those traits that is infused into the DNA for some while others unfortunately need a more formal introduction. While likability isn’t necessarily teachable, creating awareness of what jerk behavior looks like can be a helpful first step. Let’s face it – it’s probably easier to teach someone Java or Sharepoint than it is to teach them analytical thinking, empathy or compassion. Unfortunately, I find that some of the most important professional skills/traits are the least teachable. At the end of the day, life is short and no one is irreplaceable. It’s just not worth dealing with the office jerk. Oftentimes, you may work with them only as long as you have to, but then you opt to find someone else to fill the need or do it yourself as soon as you can. The Harvard Business Publishing video “The Best Way to Play Office Politics” introduces the concept of a “competent jerk” as that person in the office that you may work with because they’re good at what they do, but they’re unpleasant to deal with. Your comments or suggestions in meetings seem to fall flat and not generate much support.People relate to you in an overly polite or formal way. ![]() Team members seem to seek advice from others when you have the expertise they need.The seat next to you in the meeting is often vacant.Others don’t come over to chat casually very often. ![]()
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